Life changes...

Well, something has been going on in our lives for a couple of weeks. I guess I have been afraid that if I write about it, it would seem more real. My Papa, Emmitt Perry, went into the hospital two weeks ago. He was complaining that he felt short of breath. They spent several days trying to figure out what was causing it, and ended up calling in five specialists. Finally, five days later the oncologist found cancer on his lungs. It took several more days to find out what kind of cancer it is. It is a rare form called neuroendicrine cancer and is often found on the lungs or pancreas. The problem with this is that it is very slow growing and most people don't know they have it until they start to see complications from it. Like my papa. It started causing fluid to fill up around his lungs and they were having to drain it every few days. They inserted a port in his chest to do chemo, but after the first treatment his kidneys and heart were starting to fail. They wanted to put him on a ventilator and do dialysis. My grandmother said no at first. He had been trying to tell her he didn't want all of this stuff. She knows that he doesn't want machines to live for him. The doctors said that this was not a long term option. They just wanted to see if they could get his kidneys going again and let his body rest for long enough to help the chemo work. But, the dialysis has been going for almost 48 hours now and his kidneys are not working on their own at all. The doctors feel that after 72 hours of this they cannot do anything else. It will not be worth putting him through anything more. Right now, I am starting to accept that this is the end. But, it hurts and I am scared for my grandma. They have been together since she was 14! She told me yesterday that this is the first time in 15 years that she has slept alone in this house. I am praying for God to give her strength to make it through this, and for all of us to be support for her in this time.